The Matter of Giving
by SwoonsAndSais
Summary: If I could give you anything, I'd give you...


This is one of those memes where you put your music on, hit shuffle, and write as much as you can for the duration of a song. As soon as the song ends and a new one starts, you stop and move on to a new drabble. I put the songs that I was listening to here in case anyone would like to follow along or anything. Not really happy with this, but hey - I only had an average of about 3-4 minutes to write each one.

Title: The Matter of Giving

Author: Cait

Warnings: None, really, unless you read into it as unrequited love and that's depressing. With maybe the exception of the first one, it can be taken either way.

Awaken A Cappella - Book of Love

If I could give you anything, I'd give you a book- a very thick one, full of charts and figures and maps and diagrams so it would be just your sort of thing. Oh, I know, I'm being unoriginal but I have my reasons. I wouldn't pay attention to what was in it, because it probably wouldn't matter to you anyway. You always seem to pay the most attention to things you don't understand, things you have yet to figure out entirely. Maybe that's why you pay so much attention to him, to his mood swings and inability to control them. It's as if you think that by studying him from afar, like a naturalist studying the habits of a brand new species, you'll find the link to cracking him open and soothing the blackness and the pain. But, Donnie, I don't think that can be fixed - not even by you. I doubt that will ever stop you from trying, but…well, anyway. I'd like to find a book like that for you one day. You can read out loud from it, if you want. I'll listen – not to the words, but to the sounds. You have such a gentle, methodical voice that suits you perfectly, with every syllable precise and thought out. Sometimes I imagine what it would sound like if it cracked. Would it stumble? Would you blush? Would I tell you what I was thinking if you did? Maybe. But I think, Donnie, there are just some things you weren't meant to know.

Red Hot Chili Peppers - Dani California

Know what? If I could give you a present, I'd probably get you a bike. I know, you already got one. Doesn't matter. I'd give you a bike, because you don't have one of your own. You've got a hand-me-down we found one day that Donnie fixed up for you, so you could burn some energy. You got your skateboard, your rollerblades, your whatever-the-hell-else on wheels. You got everything but a bike of your own. I'd wanna get you one in yellow, probably, because that kind of makes me think of you. I sometimes wonder, even though our mask colors fit us, if you or any of the rest of us get sick of 'em. Anyway, I don't just see you in orange. See you in yellow, too. It'd be a real bright yellow, to annoy the shit out of anyone who was looking. You're real good at that, y'know. Heh. It'd have some pretty sick decals on the side, cuz you'd probably really like that. Surfer stuff. You'd ride it along the sidewalks of Santa Monica, because I hear the colors are brighter there and nobody walks – they all skate. The sun'd reflect off the bike and off of you, and you'd be shadowed against the ocean and the sunset and the glittering of it like you were always supposed to and can't. So nevermind – I guess I'm not giving you a bike. I'd give you daylight if I could. Think you'd like that, Mikey. Yeah…think you'd like that a lot.

Welcome Home – Coheed and Cambria

Raphael, I would like to give you the stars. I have sidestepped a great many rules of logic for the sake of our family, something that I am only slightly proud of. I've built things that have saved our lives out of complete scrap, wired up a home from what might as well have been thin air, but I have not discovered a way just yet for harnessing starlight. I've been working on it, believe me. I know that, of all of us, you are the most hot-blooded and often the most unpredictable. You practically radiate heat. You are a law of physics unto yourself sometimes, and it _fascinates _me. I would love to see the way you think, to examine the gears that turn in your head. But that's the crux of it, isn't it? Your mind doesn't work like mine. You run on something else entirely. That's why I'd like to give you the stars, Raph. I think the others see you as fire, raw and powerful, but me…I think you're a little more controlled than you let on. I think you have patterns that only you understand, that you follow without fail year after year. I see you smolder at all times, even when you're content and happy. Yes, your color is red; we've all known that since we were born, practically, but there's more to it than that. I see you as white. Raph, to me, you burn so bright and so hot it turns _cold – _a frosty heat, like stars. I'll keep trying for you. I'll build something that will either take you up or bring them down so that, for a flash of a second, you can feel like you belong.

Carbon Leaf – Paloma

Okay, dude, I've been thinking about this lately, right, and I've pretty much decided – if I were ever going to get you something really awesome and sweet and so stupidly cool you would never want anything else ever again…I'd probably give you a blanket. No, I know what you'd think – dude, what, right? Seriously, think about it. It'd be like that fail poncho you brought back from Central America, but _better _because A.) I gave it to you, and B.) because you wouldn't have to use it to just survive the cold anymore. You could use it for doing the stuff blankets are supposed to do. You could use it for like…comforting things. Like, I bet you could use it to polish your katanas. That always calms you down. Oh, yeah right, like I don't notice things like that. Whenever you're upset, you're always in the dojo with some little scrap of gross, polishing away. It's like you're looking for answers or something, and you'll find them if you can only get your swords really, really clean. You could probably also use it to hide better at night. I think you like doing that, too, dude – hiding. Yeah, you're good at it like a ninja, but I think you probably wish you could _actually _hide sometimes- from us, from your responsibilities. None of us could take it like you and sometimes that hurts a little, but most of the time…we're just grateful, bro. Bet you don't realize it, but cross my heart. But seriously, I totally understand if you want to pull the covers up over your head sometimes and pretend you don't have to get out of bed. I mean…I do. So, I'm gonna give you a blanket one day, Leo. For a lot of the reasons I already talked about but just…well, cuz mostly, I just think you need something that's gonna keep you warm.


End file.
